Day 121: Paper Flowers

A home made birthday card.

Tomorrow is the last day of month 4, and I've hit a wall on the creative front.  Last night when I was struggling to find something shiny to take a picture of, I complained to my mom and sister about it.  Jokingly, I said I wanted to quit the project because it was getting too boring.  I was mostly joking, but part of me really did want to quit because I feel like my pictures are so BORING.  Don't worry, I'm not going to quit.  Seeing this to the end is much to important to me to stop just because I got bored.

Still, I went through and looked at the last two months of photos tonight, and out of 60 days, I only like 13 of the pictures.  And most of those 13 were from August.  That means, that in the last 2 months, I've posted 37 crappy pictures.

At first I thought the photos were boring because I lacked direction.  So I asked all of you to give me ideas of what to shoot next.  You came back with a few really good ideas that I tried to implement.  But I'm struggling still.

I think my problem comes down one of to two things, really:
1. Instead of getting better at photography, I'm getting worse, and my mediocre pictures have turned downright ugly.
or
2. I'm so bored with my own photography style, that I can't see what looks good anymore.

Either way, I need some motivation.  Unfortunately, that's not something I can ask for help with.  That's something I need to find on my own.  I need a little INSPIRATION.  I need to think outside the box, and then go two steps beyond that.

I need a change of scenery.

But most of all, I need to stop taking pictures of things around my house, because it's killing my groove!

Day 120: Metal Tree

My necklace tree.

I went a little crazy on the post-processing tonight, but I had fun with it.  I've been reading a lot of Emily Dickinson the past few days to help with my writers block.  I'm still not having any luck on the poetry front, but I did find this little treasure in my search:

A word is dead
When it is said,
    Some say,
I say it just
Begins to live
    That day.

I love this poem not just because it's short, but because I love words, and I love thinking of them as living things once they are put to use.  What a great way of describing the power of a word!

Day 119: Torture

Poor Jasper.

So it's nearing 11pm, I'm checking my email and falling asleep at the computer when I suddenly realize that I haven't taken a picture yet today.  Why? You might ask?  Because I never saw anything shiny or sparkly today.  I'm seriously starting to regret this week's theme choice.

I mean, Bling?  Really?

Oh.  AND, my sister's poor cat!  First of all: I backed him into a corner and then tricked him into looking down at the string of pearls at just the right angle for me to slip them over his head.  He didn't move from that spot, but had a horribly panicked look on his face for a while until he settled down a bit.  I think they were too heavy for his neck, because he hardly moved his head at all, just sat back on his haunches and pulled his head back.

Second:  I just dressed up a little boy cat with PEARLS.  He's like a drag queen kitty.

I feel like a horrible person for putting him through that, just because I was trying to find a subject for my photograph at the very last minute.

Day 118: Bling

Yet another self-portrait.

So I went back and forth on my theme for this week, and I'm still not sure if I'm decided.  But I think I'm going to go with "Bling" as my theme.  I'll try to take a different picture every day of some sort of bling.  It was either that, or the hat I'm sporting in this pic.  I will probably use that theme later, but not yet.

Anyway, I have another bad headache tonight - can't seem to shake this one too easily - so I'm keeping it short again.

For the purpose of this week's theme, I'm loosely interpreting the word "bling" as being anything shiny and/or gaudy.  I do not mean it by the definition found in the Urban Dictionary:  "The word "bling" refers to any unnecessary accumulation of metal or jewellery which impresses the simple-minded."  Because, frankly, it's hard to find that kind of look around here, and I take issue with the phrase, "simple-minded." :)

Day 117: Peeking

Lauren after dinner tonight.

She was playing some game with her napkin, and singing tunelessly as she rubbed her face with it.  It was so cute!  I was undecided between this picture and one I took of the dessert Christine made for dinner tonight, but I finally settled on this one because - well, frankly - I like it better.  And since this is MY blog, I decided I can do whatever I like.

So even though there's hardly any red in this shot, and even though I posted a picture of Lauren just 3 days ago, I don't care.  :)

I was going to list the things I loved about today, but I have a monster headache that just keeps getting worse, so I'm logging off before it turns me blind.

Day 116: Reflections

Christine pausing on the front porch.

So I made Christine pose for this picture right before we left to see a movie tonight.  I realized as we were getting in the car that we wouldn't get out of the movie until after midnight, so we ran back out of the car and I took a quick picture of Christine with the red flowers.  She really is a good sport about these things!

One of these weekends I'll make the time to set up some of the cool shots I've had in my head for months.  But for now, I'm lucky enough to get some pretty awesome shots on the spur of the moment.

I have one more day on the red theme, so hopefully I'll have a new theme idea by Monday. :)

Day 115: Sweethearts

Mom sharing a secret with Dad.

We went out to dinner with Mom and Dad tonight, and they were so cute together.  It's always fun to watch my parents together, because it's always so obvious how much they love each other.  And they are so considerate of each other's feelings.  What great examples of married life!

Day 114: Play With Your Food

Lauren hamming it up for the camera.

Birthday party for Dad at the Pizza Pie Cafe:
Lots of family, laughter and noise.
Hyrum kept us entertained with stories of invisible frogs leaping around the room.
Esther held court at the head of the table, and wouldn't move.
Baby June captivated all the women with her wide eyes and attentiveness.
Most everyone played musical chairs as they traveled from one conversation to another.
Dad soaked up the family fun and had a grand time opening his presents, surrounded by great-grandchildren.
Lauren kept Ashlie busy with her cute high-pitched voice, and her fascination with food.

And every time I put my camera up to my face:
  Lauren would grin from ear to ear
  RoseMarie would look away
  Hyrum would accidentally cover his face
  Mom would accidentally frown
  Baby June would stop smiling
  Christine would look mentally challenged
  And Dad would have his mouth open and his eyes closed


I got a lot of pictures of Lauren and parts of Hyrum's face. :)

Day 113: Safety First

A fire hydrant.

I was running an errand for the office today and I was struck by just how many things around me that were red.  It was crazy!  Everywhere I looked I found a bright red object, but nothing as fun as this fire hydrant.

I don't know what made this fire hydrant so fun.  Maybe because it was at a good angle, maybe because it started sprinkling on me as I took the photo, or maybe because the words, "fire hydrant" always remind me of the time my brother Dave almost burned the house down.  I know what you're thinking, "how is that fun?"  But it is, and I'll tell you why.

When Dave was in high school and working on his Eagle Scout project with my dad in the dining room, he got hungry and decided to make a deep-fried burrito (a favorite of his at the time).  So he set a pot of oil to heat on the stove and went back to his project with my dad.  Inevitably, they both forgot about the pot of boiling oil until it heated up so much that it burst into flames.  While Dave and Dad addressed the huge flames consuming our kitchen, the fire department was called and our sick mom was rushed outside in her nightgown to wait on the front lawn with me and my brother James.

As dad hastened to try and put out the uncontrollable fire, he sent Dave to find a fire extinguisher from one of our neighbors (we didn't have one at the time).  So dad, being the action-oriented man that he is, quickly assessed the situation and began to dump copious amounts of water onto the now-raging, ceiling-high oil fire.  Not the recommended action for an oil fire, I know.  But he had no other tools to work with.

And while Dad was feverishly attempting to put out the blaze, Dave ran through the middle of our street yelling, "FIRE HYDRANT!  FIRE HYDRANT! DOES ANYONE HAVE A FIRE HYDRANT!?"  Most of our perplexed neighbors ignored him, since it didn't make any sense to them why he would be asking them if they had a fire hydrant, when we lived across the street from one.  Obviously, what he really meant to say was, fire extinguisher, but how often do we communicate at peak efficiency when we are panicked? Anyway, after what I'm certain was a very confusing conversation, full of hysterical yelling and finger pointing, Dave managed to bum a fire extinguisher from one of our neighbors and rush back to the house.

I can't remember if he got there before the fire fighters did, because when we retell the story, we always end it with Dave yelling, "FIRE HYDRANT!" through the streets of our neighborhood.  Ah...such a laugh!  At any rate, Dad miraculously managed to extinguish the oily flames using his dousing technique, and when the fire fighters arrived, all they really did was hack up our kitchen to make sure no flames were hiding in the attic...weird.

Another upside to this story: We got to eat out every night for a month while the kitchen was repaired.  Compliments of our insurance company! I was really young, 7 or 8, so that was the highlight of my summer!

Day 112: Balloons!

Obviously.

I have these balloons, which are awesome (because I love balloons), but I don't have any more.  Some time in the near future, I'm going to make my theme all about balloons.  That will be an awesome week.

For now, here's one RED balloon.  I wish it were 99 red balloons.  That would be epic.

Day 111: Bips

A bowl for dipping sauces.

There's a story behind this little dish, but first let me introduce this week's theme: Red.

I will be taking photo's with red in them, and highlighting the red.  I'll try to be more versatile in the subjects than I was last week.  I need more shots of people.  But I wanted to not limit myself so much this time, so the only theme this week is Red.

Ok, on to the story behind this picture.

When I was into ceramics painting a few years back, I went to Color Me Mine and painted this little dip bowl.  Let's just get this out in the open now.  I had a temporary moment of dyslexia when I made it.  I did not mean to spell "bips," but rather, "dips."  I planned on writing "dips" in the bottom so people would know what it was for, and not try to use it for something stupid, like a spoonful of ice cream, or sugar packets.  After I wrote the word in the bottom, I knew something wasn't right about it but I couldn't figure out what it was. I even figured it as far as the first letter, and tried to extend the line up and down the "d" but it still didn't look right.  Finally I gave up, deciding that it was fine, and my eyes were just tired.

It wasn't until I brought the dish home from the store - after they glazed and fired the dish, eternally sealing the words into the bottom - that I realized what was wrong with the word.  I was so mortified that I hid the dish behind all of our unused Tupperware.  Unfortunately for me, someone discovered it (I can't remember the circumstance) and once I admitted to what had happened, my roommates had a good laugh at my expense (I really don't blame them).  After that, I decided to own my mistake and see it for how funny it was.  I proudly displayed it on our kitchen table for a while, and we all got a good chuckle from it for a few weeks before the humiliation took over again and I hid it once more.

Now the poor thing is tucked away in my mom's china cabinet - mainly because we don't have much use for it.  And even though I still see how funny it is, every once in a while I get a flush of embarrassment when I see the dish.

Oh, the joys of stupid mistakes.

Day 110: Almost Alone

Jasper.

My mom thought of this picture idea and title, so I'm not sure how legal it is for me to put it on here since it wasn't my original thought, but whatever.

This is the last picture in my "Alone" theme.  Even though I was technically only alone the first 2 days of this week, I still tried to think of reasons I liked being alone, but frankly they were all a stretch - except for the first one.  This last picture is a testament to the fact that even though everyone else in the house may leave, our cats will always stay behind.  So no matter how alone I think I am, I've always got these guys trailing me around the house.  It's a nice feeling when I get bouts of loneliness or fear, to know that I can talk to the cat's and not feel quite as cuckoo as I would talking to myself.

Not quite.

As a side note, I took this picture of the sunset tonight, but it didn't go along with my theme.  This is the sun through the huge smoke cloud from the fires in Herriman.  Scary fire.

Day 109: Inspiration

My writing journal.

Sorry for the late posts.  I've been having internet issues.

So reason #6 for being alone: Inspiration.

My mind is always thinking up new stories or picture ideas, and I usually get my best ideas on my drive home from work.  I always resolve to jump on my computer the second I get home to record my writing ideas, or quickly gather the necessary items I need to take that perfect picture I thought of, but I never do it.  Usually, I walk in the door and get immediately distracted by someone or something, and completely forget about the grand ideas I had while driving home.

Admittedly, it is a stretch to blame people as my reason for not acting on my inspiration because I get distracted by just about everything when I get home from work.  But I'm running out of ideas, so there you go.

Day 108: Timely

Time moves so quickly.

Reason #5 for the goodness of solitude: no one to slow me down.

Let me make sure I clear that up.  It's not that I'm not slow all by myself.  And it's not like I'm ever on time to anything, but it seems that when I'm alone, I meet more deadlines than usual (when it comes to leaving the house).  My theory on this is that when people are around and I'm running late, any kind of conversation that inevitably ensues distracts me from my goal of getting out the door.  There's always just one more thing I need to say.  Even the mere presence of someone else in the room distracts me from getting ready.  I start worrying that I forgot to tell them something, and suddenly I've put the wrong shoe on or lost my keys or forgot my lunch in the fridge.

Still, I must admit that sometimes when I'm alone I run later than usual because there's no one there to remind me that I'm supposed to be leaving.

Day 107: Loud Reading

Some books.

Last night I stayed up too late reading.  I was close to the end of my book when it was time to put it away, so I was compelled to ignore my bedtime and finish my book.  Sometime between 1 and 2am I noticed how late it was, but still I plowed on.  I started to notice that I was trying to read very quietly.  I stopped making noises at surprising passages, and I started turning the pages slowly and quietly.  Every time I forgot to turn a page quietly, or when I unintentionally mumbled reactions to the book, I would jerk my head to my sister's bed to make sure I didn't wake her.

Here's the kicker though.  She's still out of town.  I'm so used to being sneaky when I read past my bedtime because I have a roommate.  And because my roommate just happens to wake up at the slightest crinkling noise.

So.  Reason #4 for being alone: Reading loudly.  I can yell at the book when I don't like a passage, or turn the pages as loudly as I'd like, and no one will hear me.

The sad thing is, every time I checked to make sure I didn't wake up Christine, I would get a small stab of disappointment when I realized she wasn't there.

I'm starting to have a hard time finding more positives to being alone. :)

Day 106: No Talkie

Shhhhh.

Reason # 3 of why I like being alone:  No talking

I discovered this reason today when I went to pick up my parents from the airport.  I got used to not talking on my down time - in two days I got used to it.  So during the drive home from the airport, I couldn't seem to keep the conversation rolling.  I tried to think of things to say or ask, but I kept getting distracted by other thoughts that weren't relevant to the conversation, like what I needed to do when I got back to work, or the weird dream I had last night, or the new story I've been toying with, or the hilarious music video I saw on YouTube the other day.

This is a good and a bad thing, not talking.  It's good because I allow myself to just think freely, which usually ends up with epiphanies or remembering something important.  But today was an example of why it's bad.  I get used to not voicing my thoughts way too fast, and then I become a mute who kills conversations in the throats of its victims in mere minutes.

My poor parents.  They were all hyped up on their awesome trip to Alaska, virtually bubbling with stories and happy words.  But ten minutes with me, Debbie Downer, and they soon lost their thunder and any will to continue the conversation.  By the time we got home, the car was a tomb of silence.  I definitely need to watch out and stop myself from repeating that next time.

I tried to apologize later, but a lost conversation - especially one stopped mid-run - is like a regretted comment.  Once it's gone, there's no getting it back.

Day 105: Organizing

My DVD collection (some of it).

So, reason number two - and photo number two in my theme this week - for why I like my solitude:
Productivity.

This is my DVD collection in my room.  I've been meaning to reorganize it for MONTHS.  Longer, acutally.  I never get around to it though, because I organize best when I'm alone and blasting music or watching reruns.  Tonight, not only did I organize my DVD's, but I did more laundry, straightened up the house, made dinner, packed my lunches for the next few days, did the dishes, took out the trash, and did my nails.  I can't remember the last time I got that many things done in one night. (I don't multi-task well at home)

Now THAT'S what I call being PRODUCTIVE!

Day 104: Alone

Empty Chair.

Freedom!!  I'm alone for two whole days before my family gets back into town, and I'm so excited.  I'm sure everyone who is reading this already knows that I'm not the most social creature on the planet.  I like people, but I really like them better in small doses.  This summer has been one giant overdose of people for me, so having two full days in an empty house makes me almost giddy.

When I got home from work this evening, I spent most of my time doing chores that I never get around to, while watching the US Open (tennis) finals.  I had planned on catching up on a few TV shows I never get to watch, but tennis was good too.  I had left overs for dinner, which actually seem to taste better to me when I'm by myself.  And I played some music full blast and sang along with it as I did my house work.  What a great night!

Going along with the theme idea, this week I'll be taking pictures of things that represent isolation and why I like it.  The empty chair represents the absence of judgement.  I can't be in trouble if there's no one around to disappoint. And since I live in constant fear of disappointing everyone, this is my number one favorite reason for needing alone time every once in a while.

:D So excited to have one more day of alone time!

Day 103: Hanging Out

Hyrum walking Charley Chaplin style.

I was going to start my theme for the week with today's photo, but in all honesty, I don't think I'll have the chance to take a picture of a different child every day this week (I've got a full schedule this time), so I'll start my theme tomorrow.  I'll also decide tomorrow what theme I'll do. :)  If you don't know what I'm talking about, read this post and it's comments.

RoseAnne came over this evening to drop some stuff off, and I was so excited because I haven't seen her in the longest time!  We got to chat and hang out while the kids played in the living room, and I got to grab a few shots of the kids before they left.  Also, we had a regional stake conference today, and it was awesome!  We got to hear from three general authorities!

As usual, it was a great Sunday.

Day 102: Light is Alive

The light from the setting sun.

Light is amazing!  Especially sunset.  If there's one thing I've learned over the years of taking pictures is that sunset is my favorite time of day to capture.  Something truly magical happens when the sun just begins to touch the ground.  Everything flares up in beautifully stark contrasts and shadows become more defined.  Faces glow in beauty, flowers and plants become transparent and radiant, lakes and rivers shine golden and deep blue, and the light surrounds everything so tangibly, it feels as if you could touch it.  This shot of the sunset light is the perfect embodiment of why I love the sunset so much.  It looks like a cloud of light that is moving down the street: a real, corporeal thing that comes to life for only a few minutes each day.  THAT is why I love the sunset, because it's alive with possibilities!

Day 101: Good Morning

Sunrise in front of my house.

I stepped out the front door this morning to leave for work, and this is the sight that greeted me.  GORGEOUS!  I could not pass up the opportunity to capture this beautiful sky.  Luckily for me, I carry my camera with me everywhere I go, so I grabbed it from my bag and within seconds of leaving the house I had half a dozen sunrise shots on my memory card.

It's views like this that make my day go so well!  How can anyone ask for anything more beautiful!

Day 100: Triple Digits!

A tree behind the Cottonwood shopping center.

One hundred days!!  Only 265 more to go!  A little less than one-third.  Triple digits.  SWEET!

So now that I've got 100 days under my belt, I would like to ask anyone who is still reading this blog to please give me ideas (and I mean in the general sense, like, "You should take more pictures of puppies, or windmills, or sports.").  I don't usually ask this question because I get suggestions from friends and family all the time - without asking.  But I have 2 reasons for asking this time:

One: Because I'm starting to run out of ideas, and
Two: Because I would like to know if there's anything that my small pool of readers is bored with (and I'm bored with just about everything right now).

So, bring it on.

Day 99: Sick

The slightly worse-for-wear sunflowers from the other night.

I kind of feel the way this flower looks tonight.  Something I ate this evening did not agree with me, and I've been balled up on the couch most of the night.  It's not a severe reaction, just a little nausea and cold sweats.  However, it's annoying enough for me to barely get any of my chores done tonight.  So I mustered up enough will power to take a few shots around the house, and even though I already took a shot of these flowers this week, I'm using another one because it fits my mood.

Enjoy. :)

Day 98: Dancing

Katie.

I looked out my window this evening to see the neighborhood children running and skipping back and forth on the sidewalk outside my house.  They were all in such a good mood and being so cute, that I decided to try and capture it.  I got this shot of Katie, who was so happy dancing and twirling and skipping along that she didn't notice that the other kids had passed her by and gone on to another house.

Oh, the unabashed joy of children!

Here are some lessons we can learn from Katie:
*You only look foolish if you feel foolish
*Sometimes you need to let loose
*Enjoying the simple things in life will make you happy all the time
*You don't need to follow the crowd
*Never be afraid to dance with reckless abandon - all by yourself.

:D

Day 97: Seeing Stars

The coat hook on my bedroom door.

This has been a great Labor Day.  I took the holiday very seriously this time, and rested from my labors.  Hopefully that will give me the energy and concentration I need to be more productive at work this week.

So...September...

This is going to be a long month.  And so will October, for that matter.  I'm going to try and stay positive, but it's not looking good right now.  So, here's to better days, I guess.

Day 96: Dinner

My dinner plate.

Tonight we had an unusual combination of foods for dinner: Sweet Potato Fries (although, I think they may have been Yam fries because they were too orange for sweet potatoes), Red Cabbage, and Steak.

YUM!

We also had some home-made cinnamon raisin bread.  Even though my meal contained both steak AND fries, it still felt really healthy because of the brightly colored food.  And we all know that vegetables that have bright colors have more vitamins and antioxidants in them.  Right?

Anyway, it was a yummy dinner, compounded by the awesome wind outside (because wind makes everything better).

Day 95: Sunflowers

A sunflower from Mary.

Yesterday Mary came over and dropped of a bouquet of beautiful sunflowers for my mom.  It was so nice!  Unfortunately for my mom, she's on a cruise with my dad for the next two weeks, so she will miss these beautiful flowers.  Yay for me though!  I love flowers!

Do you know what else I love, that I recently discovered?

Balloons.

I love balloon bouquets to be exact.  Every time I go to a party or event that has balloons, I secretly obsess over how I might get away with stealing those balloons when I leave.  I saw pictures for a wedding once that had a carnival theme, and they had a bunch of balloon bouquets everywhere.  I was dying over it!  It wasn't until a few months ago when I saw someone walking in a park with a huge bunch of balloons floating after them that I realized my love of balloons.  Now if only I could find an acceptable occasion in which to buy myself a balloon bouquet...

Day 94: Friends, Flowers, Awesomeness

Decorative grasses in the parking lot.

My night:
*Whining
*Crispy cheese fries
*Heating pad
*Catching up with Mary
*Beautiful sunflowers
*Oily popcorn
*Pain pills
*Caffeine high
*Scott Pilgrim
*Pictures in the parking lot
*Laughing
*Happy birthday songs
*Accents
*Lying to the waiter
*More laughing
*Hospital stories
*More Scott Pilgrim
*Distractions and good times!

(And as a side note: Scott Pilgrim vs. The World is my new favorite!  It's weird.  Really weird...and awesome!)

Day 93: HDR

Yeah, I know.  It's bad.

I found this website today called "I Hate Your HDR" and I thought it was funny.  I read an article they posted a link to, and it got me thinking about HDR and how I've never really been able to pull it off for real (click here to learn more about HDR).  I use the HDR filter often when I post-process my shots, but I've never actually been able to produce a real HDR shot using the three exposures.

So after reading the funny posts of bad HDR photos, I decided to give it a go one more time.  I set up a mediocre shot, and took the three pictures, then uploaded it to my computer and merged them.

First of all, I must have moved the camera just a fraction during the picture taking, because it's a little blurry around the edges.  Secondly, the three exposures combined to make a pretty washed out, drab photo, so I uppped the contrasts and saturation a bit during post processing.

Still, it doesn't look HDR at all.  So I took the normal exposure and I uploaded it to Picnik, and I hit the "HDR-ish" button, and this is how it turned out:

Yeah...I'm just not getting it.  Plus, taking three shots and having to merge them later is a lot more annoying than clicking one button in Picnik.  It's probably good though, because it seems HDR is starting to get a bad name anyway. ;)

Day 92: Self-awareness

Somewhere in AF.

I'm pretty in tune with myself when it comes to figuring out my flaws and processes.  I like to say that I'm self-aware, which I use as a positive thing, but at times like today, when I figure something out about myself that I don't like, I really hate that phrase.

I was talking to Christine about something I've been thinking about, and as I explained my thought process, I could hear how cynical I was being about it.  And it hit me.  I have a complete lack of confidence or faith in people.  I never thought of myself as a glass-half-empty kind of person, but when it comes to my fellow man, apparently I am.  It wouldn't be so bad if I were a cynic in general, but I'm only a cynic when it comes to people's ability to change and become better.

I don't think anyone can change?!  What!?  Me?

Yep.

It's tragic.  I'm fundamentally flawed if I think no-one has a chance to progress.  But I guess the self-aware part really helps, because I KNOW that's not true.  I seriously know better than to think that people aren't capable of progressing.  I mean, that's the whole point of this life!!  To become better, to grow, to learn!

So if I've been allowing myself to subconsciously judge my fellow man like that, then I need to stop.  Because that kind of thinking not only stops my own ability to change and grow, but it stops my ability to trust and love as well.  And what's the point of life without those things!