Day 244: My Other Love

One of my favorite poetry books.

I have a poetic soul, somewhere deep inside me.
And it's screaming too be let out,
To find a place in my everyday,
To be in charge, or at least have a say.

My inner poet yearns for literary freedom.
It understands the power of words,
It glories in their beauty,
And feels the tangible strength they give.

My poetic soul is impatient and hungry,
And it scares me a little.
So I keep it locked up,
And only let it out on special occasions.

To be admired and mourned from a distance.

Day 243: De-Junking

A pile of junk from my closet.

My sister and I planned this big clear-out day on Saturday.  We were going to get rid of all the clutter and haul it all to the thrift store.  We were going to get so much cleaning done.

We put it off until the end of the day, and quickly filled up these few bags of stuff within an hour before bed.

I still haven't begun to go through my closet, let alone my out-of-control bathroom.  Maybe if I take it one section at a time I'll actually do it.

Day 242: Don't Laugh

Me...again.

Ok, so here's what happened.

I took a picture of myself in my new swimsuit today - in my bathroom mirror - purely for personal documentation.  It was supposed to be my "before" picture, and then after I loose the 10 lbs I wanted to loose to look good in this new suit, I was going to take an "after" picture and compare them.

I was not planning on using it for my blog.

Ever.

But when I realized at 1AM that I hadn't taken a picture for the day (aside from the one above) I realized I was up a creek.

So I cropped it to death.

Because this is - after all - a before picture, and, by no means, do I want anyone to see it but me!

Day 241: Pile of Bones

"The Pile"

When my parents are home, our entry-way never looks this bad.  My mom probably straightens out the shoes 2 or 3 times a week.  But alas, they have been out of town for almost two weeks now, and my sister and I can't be bothered to put the shoes in order when we're just going to be messing them up in two seconds.

Unfortunately, as I glanced around the living room today, looking for inspiration for another photo, I realized that this mess of shoes resembles a mass grave.  Or at least, it reminds me of the images of genocide that they showed us in school.

It was a morbid thought when it entered my mind.  And it perched there all evening as I remembered the horrors of our past, and the sick beauty of the photography and art that has portrayed that suffering over the years.  I guess you could say that I brooded over it until I finally took the picture and let the thoughts escape my mind through the image, to camp there for a while.

Sometimes taking pictures is very cathartic...like mental fly paper, the photographs draw the feelings towards them until they stick like glue and dislodge from my mind, to reside elsewhere.

Day 240: Texting

Ryan in his natural habitat...texting.

It was 11:30, I was out with friends when I realized I hadn't yet taken a picture for the day.  Ryan graciously allowed me to take a picture of him as long as it was just his hands.  He entered this text just for the picture, "Why are you taking pictures of me ESDOMWEL?"

It's a funny story behind the acronym, ESDOMWEL, but it's not mine to tell (or in other words, I won't tell it well), so I'll just tell you what it means:

Every
Single
Day
Of
My
Whole
Entire
Life

I laughed when I read the text and said that picture was going on my blog.

Then I laughed when he told me that was fine since it was just picture of his hands this time.

Poor Ryan.  He'll never get over the last picture I took of him...especially since it lives in infamy on my wall of fame.

:D

Day 239: Typical

Me and my wet hair

I knew it was time for another self-portrait, but I didn't want to deal with thinking of something clever.  So I took a bunch of shots of myself around the room and this is the one I ended up with.

Typical.

Typical facial expression.
Typical hair shot.
Typical editing job.

Whatever, I'm too tired to care now.

Day 238: Lamplight Stock

A tree highlighted by a street lamp.

Tonight I found myself in a great area of lamp-lit trees.  After several attempts at photographing different trees around the pathway I was on, I found this beauty.  It was the perfect lucky shot that actually made me ooh with pleasure when I was it on the LCD screen!

I love trees because they have so much character.  There's so much to look at and they provide such stark contrasts depending on the time of year.

For some reason, I love leafless trees the best.  They make the prettiest photos.  They fill me with a peace I can't describe.

Day 237: Polka-dot

My new swim suit!

I'm gearing up to go on my cruise in February (so excited!) and one of my goals is to loose a few pounds.  I've been lacking in motivation the last...oh...month or so, so I decided to copy that Yoplait commercial from a few years ago and hang my swim suit up above my bed as a motivator.

Hopefully it works.

If not, at least I get to admire my new suit for a few weeks!

Day 236: Magic Top

Christine spinning a top on her hand.

Danni came over tonight to give us our belated Christmas presents.  She got to spend her Christmas in Belgium with her parents and she came back with some awesome, authentic, gifts.

Both Christine and I got a top from Amsterdam and these things are amazing!  They spin on the weirdest things!  I couldn't get mine to spin on the tabletop when we first got them, and as we all sat around chatting in the living room, I tried to spin mine on the couch arm rest and it balanced perfectly!  Then I tried to spin it on my knee, and again, perfect balance!  So Christine decided to try spinning her top in the palm of her hand and it was so cool!  Every time we spun it in our hands, it would dance around our palms.  I got this shot as the top was spinning right off the edge of Christine's hand.

So cool!

Day 235: The Glowing Orb

The moon tonight.

This isn't my best shot.  I tried to take a "quick" picture of the awesome moon tonight because the clouds were moving so fast across it, and I had a short window of opportunity.  I didn't have time to grab my tripod and set up for a proper night shot, so this is the best I could do.

Still...

I like it because now I have a solid reminder of that excited feeling I got when I looked out the window to see the awesomeness in the sky.

Day 234: Candy Shoppe

My parents' candy bowl

So my parents are out of town this month visiting my aunt and uncle.  When they are here, they are the neighborhood grandparents, and they keep a bowl of candy at the front door to hand out to the children on the block.  They love it.

I am constantly tempted by that dang candy bowl and often cheat on my "no sugar" rule because of that bowl.

They left it at the front door, full of left over holiday candy.  How am I supposed to resist it when I walk past it two or three times every day??  And it's not like my parents are here to give it out to the kids in the neighborhood.

Dumb candy bowl.

Day 233: The "Dead" of Winter

A field of dead sunflowers.

I passed this field on my way back to the office after lunch the other day and I was struck by the tragic beauty of the scene.  Everything has to die sometime, we all know this, but seeing an entire field of sunflowers - a signal of light and happiness - was gut-wrenching.  I was so struck by it, in fact, that I took a drive to that field during my lunch break today just to capture that feeling on my camera.

I won't go too far into the symbolism of this picture.  I could write a novel or give a lecture series on my thoughts about its significance.  But I will say this:  we can always take any experience in life one of two ways.  We can either see it as a positive or a negative.  And even though this picture looks pretty negative, I see it as a method of motivation.  Because I see it as a reminder that there is a time and a season for every living thing, and in the winter of our lives things can get a bit hopeless sometimes.  But we need to remember that spring will come.  The weather will change and every wasteland will be overturned and given new life.

Day 232: Cheap Shot

My lame attempt at capturing the sunset cloud.

So tonight on my way to the temple I noticed the awesome pink cloud domineering the sky.  I was pulling out of a parking lot so I didn't have a lot of time to take a picture.  Still, I whipped out my camera as fast as I could and snapped a few quick shots without checking the settings.

The pictures turned out like crap.

Luckily I like to edit the heck out of every picture I take, so I was able to salvage at least one of them.

Day 231: Flooding Hassles

The new padding for my carpet.

So...

Monday morning I woke up to a soggy carpet and wet furniture.  I live in the basement bedroom with my sister, and apparently our drain pipe outside got clogged and flooded the window well next to my bed.  At first we just tried to dry the carpet by moving all of the furniture out of the way and putting towels down and a fan on the area.

Then Dave (my brother) stepped in and reminded us of the padding underneath the carpet and it's mold potential.  Immediately mom was sure she smelled mold, so up the carpet came.  Dad rushed out in his sick state and bought new padding, moved all my furniture (bookcase, dresser, clutter of junk, bed, cabinet, etc.), ripped up the carpet, cut out the old padding, and dried off the cement in 2 days!

Tomorrow he'll place this new padding and replace the carpet before he Mom leave for Arizona for at least a month.  Crazy!!

Day 230: Fire Mountain

A view of tonight's sunset from my front porch.

I almost didn't get this shot out of pure stubbornness.  Christine told me how cool the sunset was looking, but I had already taken a picture, and I suddenly felt a wave of annoyance that she would assume that I needed picture ideas.

Idiot.

I always need picture ideas, and yet I always scoff when people give me any.

Luckily I realized I was being ridiculous and got up to see what she was talking about.  

Awesome view!  Click! 

Too bad it didn't turn out as bright on the photo.  It was practically red in real life.

Day 229: Quizzical

Jack

Tonight was RoseAnne's birthday party, and a bunch of the family got together at her house to help her celebrate.  It was so fun to hang with the family and see all the babies.  I was so stressed out all day, and even though the thought of the party stressed me out, I knew once I got there I would have a great time.

And I did.

Knew it.

I laughed until my face turned purple and I lost my voice!  We traded the funniest stories that only my family knows how to tell.  My favorite one was the story Mom told about Dad embarrassing her to death on their cruise to Alaska.  I promised her that I wouldn't re-tell it though, so tough luck.  I doesn't translate well in writing anyway.  There were hand gestures and facial expressions that were crucial to the story.

Day 228: Steeping

Sleepytime Tea

I decided to make myself a cup of tea tonight, and as I was waiting for the water to heat, I decided it would be fun to capture a picture of the tea steeping and bleeding into the water.  So I poured the water into a glass jar in order to capture the process.  It was fun to take pictures along the entire steeping process.  I felt like a little kid doing a science fair project.  All that was missing was my science partner taking notes.

Today was tough.  I left work early yesterday to watch that movie with my coworkers, and I paid for it today.  I had to come in to the office to make up for the work I missed yesterday, and it was not fun.  I was tired and grumpy and slow.  It took me way longer to do my work than usual, which only made me more upset since I was missing my Saturday.

Needless to say, I'm a little grumpy about the whole thing, but I'm hoping I'll feel better about it come Monday. :)

Day 227: Repeat

Jasper

I wasn't going to do another picture of my sister's cat tonight, but the other pictures I took today turned out horribly and I loved the way this one turned out.

So, there you go.  I win.

I'm glad it's officially the weekend.  I went out with my coworkers after work today and saw The Green Hornet on IMAX.  That was fun!  I don't really see the need for it to be 3D though.  That felt like a waste of energy, and a pain in my head (the glasses were too small).  But as for the movie, I thought it was hilarious - just as I was expecting - and I loved it!

Not too jazzed about the big guy sitting next to me though.  I got stuck next to a man who could have easily taken up two seats.  He was encroaching so far into my seat that I was leaning obnoxiously into my poor co-worker, Todd.  I mean, it's not like I'm a petite girl myself.  I needed all the space my little seat had to offer, so having to relinquish a third of it to some strange man did not make me comfortable.  Luckily for me Todd had room to spare in his seat since he's so small.

That's not the worst part though.  This guy would make an excellent candidate for Santa Claus because his entire body (not just his belly) shook like a bowl full of jelly every time he laughed.  Unfortunately, this also made my seat shake like a bowl full of jelly...but I was not laughing.

It did make for a memorable evening, so at least there's that. :)

Day 226: Stress Case

What my stress looks like on paper.

Tonight at dinner I was telling my mom and sister that it would be interesting to see what my stress looked like if it were on the outside instead of bottled up in silent terror.

I've been a little stressed today, if you can't tell.

We all joked about it.  Christine said it would be like some kind of intense aura, Mom said it would be red to convey the stress, and I said that wasn't good enough, that it would have to be noisy as well as bright.

Fireworks were mentioned.

I thought about it after dinner and thought it would be fun - and perhaps therapeutic - to try and represent my internal struggles from today in a picture.

This is what I came up with.  The scribbled lines around my head equal the noise and confusion I've been feeling all day, and my expression is what I've been doing all day as well.  I'm pretty sure I wiped my makeup off by 10 this morning.

To get this shot, I set up my camera in my room after I drew the squiggly lines all over some paper on my wall, then I set my camera to take a picture every second (like in a photo booth), that way I would have a chance to think of a good way of expressing my anxiety.  The result was pretty funny, and did help to alleviate my stress a bit.

Below is a GIF file of the experience.  I tried to make it into a time lapse video tonight, but my computer wasn't cooperating.  My favorite part is when I make that horrible face and crack myself up.  See if you can find it.

Day 225: Ice

A frozen snow drift.

I went to lunch today with the express purpose of getting a picture because I knew I wouldn't have time this evening.  I drove around until I was almost out of time before I finally stopped and settled for this picture.  It's not the most eye-grabbing thing I've seen, but it's not horrible.

I went to the Jazz game with my family tonight and we had a blast!  It was great fun to go out to eat at a fancy restaurant first and then hit the game.  I would have taken pictures at the game, but I was too worried about my camera being damaged or stolen in that big of a crowd. So...maybe another time. :)

Day 224: Static Daydreams

Steam rising in the morning air.

This picture is me.
It's everything I like about poetry, books, music, art, movies, etc.
It's dark and beautiful, and a little confusing.
It's inexact and interesting.

One day I'll be able to write the perfect story,
Filled with melancholy
And beauty.
And intrigue.

Someday I'll find the words to express,
This thing that I love about the world.
But the words are lost somewhere.
Wherever this dream is that I keep chasing.

So for now I will have to show it in pictures.
My love of that imperfect beauty.
That static dream that is just beyond reach.

Until I get it right.

Day 223: Games I Don't Play

My parents' game shelves.

Today I finally put to paper my resolutions for the new year.  One of them is to go to bed on time every night. I'm already late.

Therefore, this will be brief.

This game cupboard is full of games I never play because I don't usually like games.  But it's well placed and I like the way it looks.  Also, when I'm feeling in a really good mood, I like to join my family for a quick game or two.  As long as I take board games in small doses I usually enjoy myself...and I'd like to keep it that way. :)

Day 222: My Momma

My gorgeous mom.

She did not want me taking this picture, but since it turned out so well, she gave me permission to use it on my blog.  I think the reason I don't take more pictures of people lately is because I know none of them want me to take pictures of them.  They always get that panicked look when they see me aim my camera at them, with the immediate hiding of the face with their hands or ducking behind someone.  It's very disconcerting and doesn't encourage me to take pictures of people.

I blame the blog.  Apparently none of my friends or family want to be famous. :)

But mom was a good sport.  She laughed and said, "Don't you dare!" But she still smiled for the picture and didn't hide.  That's nice.  But then again, mom is always a good sport about stuff.  She is so kind and always willing to help everyone all the time.  And I never tell her enough how much I appreciate her or how much I love her.

So Mom, this one's for you.  Love ya!

Day 221: The Keys

My piano.

It's old and scratched, and a little out of tune, but I love this piano.  I remember the day we got it.  I was so excited to have a REAL piano and not have to try and play with our dumb Casio keyboard.  When we first got it, and after it had been tuned, I would play it all the time.  I didn't know many songs (I still don't) because I dropped out of piano lessons after only 2 years, but I would play those few songs over and over again, reveling in the feel of the keys as I pushed them down and the feel of the pedals.

Now this poor thing sits in our basement.  It hardly ever gets used because no one in my family really plays the piano very well.  I'm really the only one who tinkers around on it every now and then.  It still brings me comfort to play this piano.  When I'm stressed or anxious, I'll come down stairs and play one of the few tunes I still remember.  Or sometimes when I'm feeling ambitious, I'll plunk out new ones from a hymn book or an old piano lesson book that's lying around.  I'm glad my parents never sold it.

Day 220: Invisibility Sign

Todd's sign to ward off unwanted interruptions.

It's funny.  When you work in an office with cubicles, it's virtually impossible to isolate yourself from your coworkers when you need to.  This happens to me all the time when I try to get a big project done, or when I want to eat my lunch at my desk.  I'll put it in my calendar that I do not wish to be disturbed, I'll let everyone know at staff meeting, I'll even put a big screen shot on my computer that I'm busy, but I'll still get half a dozen people come up to me while I'm elbows-deep in paper work (or food, heh) and ask me to drop everything to answer a simple question.  It's very frustrating, but ultimately unavoidable without an office.

Such was the case today with Todd.  He needed to be left alone, so he attempted to put the point across by printing this handy little sign shown above, "It may look like I'm here, but I'm not...just keep walking."

I laughed when I saw it, not only because it was supposed to be funny, but because we all knew it wouldn't work.  And of course, it didn't.  He still had several people come to his desk and ask him questions or give him more work.  I observed the people who disturbed his requested solitude, and most of them didn't even notice the sign.  And those who did read his sign, chuckled, and then walked over and interrupted him anyway.

Perhaps because it was an ambiguous thing: I'm not really here, just keep walking.  That doesn't really say, "Please don't bug me. I don't have the time to help you right now."

Perhaps his sign should have read, "I can't help you right now. Go bug someone else."

Eh.  Who am I kidding?  It still wouldn't have worked.

Day 219: Swank

Fancy drinks.

Tonight we went to a restaurant in Provo for Christine's birthday.  We were going to go to Los Hermanos, but it's gone.  We were shocked about the loss of Los Hermanos, but it was freezing and we were on a strict time table, so we walked a few blocks down to Spark, this new little restaurant/club in downtown Provo.  Their website says they are a "Restaurant Lounge" but it felt more like a high end - members only - club, or some really swanky restaurant in New York.  The decorations and atmosphere were very hipster feeling, and the food looked like it was prepared by a chef.  Very yummy.

The difference with this Restaurant is that they don't serve alcohol.  At least not as far as I can tell.  So even though their menu had a long list of drinks that would normally be served with alcohol (they even listed martinis that were virgin...??), each was listed as "seltzer water" instead.  I love that!

We had fun ordering cool-sounding drinks and asking the waiter about it.  I ordered a Mango Mojito (virgin, in case you missed it) - it was really good!  And Ryan got a drink called Black Lemonade, which is a soda you can buy in a bottle that looks like poison (complete with the skull and cross bones on the label) which made it really fun to look at.  His was basically sour lemonade and soda, and it was pretty good. And yes, it was actually black.  Although from the picture you can't tell, it kind of had a blue-green tint to it, which is cool.

Fun night!  I love trying new places.  Definitely check this place out if you're up for something new.

Day 218: Highlighted

A grove of trees

So, I realize that the last few weeks I've alternated between pictures of trees and pictures of things up close, but I don't really care tonight.  I saw this tree as I was pulling into the parking lot at the temple, and I loved it so much that I braved the cold (in my skirt) and made the trek across the icy parking lot to get the best angle. The sun was highlighting the trunk of the tree so beautifully that it literally caught my eye as I drove past it.  That's the kind of picture I should stop to take more often.

Now, if only I had gotten a clean shot of it.  Every picture I took of this tree was just a bit off somehow.  I was very sad when I downloaded them onto my computer and realized that none of them captured the beauty of the moment.

Oh well.  Better luck next time, right?

Day 216: My Nemesis

The Scale

I'm doing this fitness/weight loss challenge with some "friends" right now.  The goal is to loose 10 pounds in 10 weeks.  A simple enough goal in theory, but nearly impossible for me to actually accomplish.  I've been hovering around the same weight for almost a month now, and I only have 3 weeks left to hit my goal.  I'm so far away from making it that I'm starting to loose hope.

And to top it off, for the past three days I've been a ridiculously high weight and I can't figure out what I did to make myself go up so high overnight.

This morning, when I walked into the bathroom to get ready for work, I wanted to spit on that stupid scale.

Day 216: Words and Work

Bananagrams

Today was my first day back to work after a 10-day break.  It wasn't as brutal as I was anticipating, which is really nice!  It makes going back to work a happy thing instead of a dreaded chore.

Also, I'm glad to get back into routine.  I'm not very good at maintaining routine, but I always feel better when I try.

Now, if only I had something interesting to report on for a change...I'll work on that and get back to you. :)

Day 215: Month 7 is Here!

A button I have that says, "Kiss me before another year goes by!"

So, month six is complete, and we are on to month seven!  I don't know if I should be counting myself as successful on this little project or not.  I may have taken a picture every day, but I was horribly neglectful with the blog posts last month.  Sure, I made excuses, but they weren't very good ones.  I have resolved to be better this month and the rest of the project.  Let's hope that resolution lasts.

Day 214: Happy New Year!

Kim, rockin' out to the New Year!

I just want to start off this post by saying how glad I am that Kim came over last night!  It's just not a party without Kimmy there to help get everyone pumped!  Also, I'm psyched that she came because I finally got a picture of her for my 3-6-5 project!  Sure, most of her face is covered, but at least it's my *sister* Kimmy!  The one who got me into photography in the first place!  Love you, Soph!

Okay, so on with the description.  Last night we had our traditional New Year's Eve party: movie marathon, friends, and lots of food.  It was so fun to just have a chill evening with friends, hanging out, eating good food, and watching corny movies.

We started the movie marathon with Inception, which was really fun, but it took us a while to finish because it's long, and we kept pausing it to get food and talk about the movie.  That was a good time, but not as fun as the second movie, The Transporter!  By the time we started that movie it was less than an hour to midnight, so we were pretty slap happy.  It made for a very enjoyable watch as we all made fun of the corny soundtrack and unbelievable fight moves.  Then when it was time to bring in the new year, we stopped the movie and got out our noise makers and cameras (translation: I got out my camera).

It was so fun goofing off and doing silly poses for the camera!  Sometimes I forget how fun it is to be a total nerd with my friends until I get a chance to do it!

Good times everyone!  Now go out there and live your dream this year!